What's the biggest moving musle in a womens body. Excuse me, but would you like an orally stimulated orgasm? Of course there's lots of fish in the sea, but you're the only one I'd love to catch and mount back at my place. I forgot my blow job at your house, can i come over and get it? Below is a list of pick ups that will make you bust out laughing at the seams. You're so hot, I'd better smother you with my body before you burst into flame! Hi, are you here to meet a nice man or will I do? Your so hot when i look at you I get a tan 76. Didn't I see you on the cover of Vogue? I hope there's a fireman around, cause you're smokin'! Snap, Crackle, and Pop with these funny pickup lines! Know what I like best about you baby? What's the name of your perfume? Don't worry, I'll protect you. Bump into someone If I knew how hot you were I would have grabbed your ass instead of bumping into you.
If you had been any less beautiful, you would have just heard a bad pickup line. Like Motel 6, I'll leave the light on for you. Do you know what I did last night? Girl, if I were a fly, I'd be all over you, because you're the shit! A song from your lips is an aria from heaven. Funny pickup lines can take some thinking. You must work at Subway 'cause you're giving me footlongs! Is that a mirror in your pocket 'cause I can see myself in your pants. Your eyes are blue, like the ocean.
Once I pop ya, I just can't stop ya. Your choice this time, I'm buying. Life without you would be like a broken pencil. What's a nice girl like you doing with a face like that? I heard you like Magic, well bend over and watch my dick disappear Can I park my car in your garage? Because I have a sudden urge to plant you right here! But in the night, they're on my floor. I got a queen size bed and Im tired of sleeping alone.
You have the ass of a great artist. All lines on our website come in both image and text form so they can be shared on social media, used as profile pictures etc. Cause I'm gonna spread them tonight Do you like trampolines, cause I got something for you to bounce up and down on. Good because you look like my favorite topping!. How about you be my story and I'll be your climax! Welcome to the funny pickup lines section! If you were a pill I'd overdose.
I am beset by this dragon in my loins, and only you can quench its fire! Excuse me, but weren't we blissfully married in a past life? Scientists call me a medical miracle. I'm a writer, you're a writer, how about we get naked together and put some poetry in motion? Most people would agree that society these days has lost a bit of it's civility. Do you want to come over to my place and feed your beaver some wood? Of course, if I were on you I'd be cumming too. I think that you have a little bit of witch in you. Hey baby, you must be a light switch, coz every time I see you, you turn me on! Can I be your butter on your bread? Cause you just cured my erectile dysfunction. Hey, you've got a lawyer's ass. I like my women like I like my coffee, full of cream.
You make my pants feel two sizes too small. You must be Jamaican, because Jamaican me crazy. Each night with me is a unique experience. Im like chocolate pudding, I look like crap but im as sweet as can be. If i had one wish i would turn u into a motorbike, why? Picker upper: If I were a cop, I'd arrest you.
She- Thanks, my boyfriend thinks so too! You know, its girls like you that make me wish I were a lesbian. I think that your attractive and simply amazing from what I've seen so far. I wanna put my thingy into your thingy. Yesterday, I tried to paint you, but I couldn't. Baby, Your the honey on my bunches of oats! You better stretch your ribs, here come more funny pickup lines! Has any one ever told you your ass looks like a phone cause I want to hit the pound button all day long. Wanna see a trick I learned in prison? If I could be anything, I'd love to be your bathwater. Damn girl, you have more curves than a race track.
You know you're in love when you can't fall asleep because reality is finally better than your dreams. If I followed you home, would you keep me? I remember, it was in my dreams! Does your pussy smell like fish because I like sushi I'm like Domino's Pizza. Hey, officer, give me a ticket, because I'm in your restricted area. If i was a ballon, would you blow me. Final 10 of the funny pickup lines collection! If beauty were time, you'd be an eternity. You know your good enough to give my last name to.
Can I invade your personal space? Get ready to get your laugh on. I am not a queen but I'll give you something royal. Do you like Krispy Kreme, cause I'm gonna glaze your donut. You know I'd like to invite you over, but I'm afraid you're so hot you'll skyrocket my air-conditioning bill. I've had quite a bit to drink, and you're beginning to look pretty good. You, Before I Wake Up From this Dream. You look so hot that I could cook rice on you! I like my women, like I like my ice cream, fat free and dripping down my fingers Your beauty is why God invented eye balls, your booty is why God invented my balls.
If I was a watermelon, would you spit or swallow my seed? Cause you gonna be choking on the D I'm no rooster, but watch what this cock-a-do-to-you They call me the cat whisperer, cause I know exactly what the pussy needs. Your Ass Looks Nice, does it need servicing cause I got a wrench and some screws just for you. Are you an architect, cause I want you on staff for my next erection. I once knew a squirrel named Marvin. Looks don't matter, I'll just wrap you in a flag and fuck you for glory.